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Asking divorce from adulterous husband

Question

My husband and I have been married six months. He has three other wives. He is a good man and follows Islam in every way except that he has been committing adultery, outside marriage all his life. Before our marriage he promised me that he knew this was wrong and by marrying me he was trying to change his ways. His transgressions have improved but he is still committing Zina, even though less frequently. He asks me to give him more time till he can recover from this habit of a lifetime. I fear I cannot stay with him even though I can see he has improved because he is still committing sin. Is it correct for me to ask for divorce or should I wait for him to change his ways, as he has promised he will do?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

Fornication and adultery are one of the great major sins which require repentance to Allaah. Allaah Says (which means): {And come not near the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily it is a Faahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits; a great sin) and an evil way (that leads one to Hell) unless Allaah forgives him/her.}[Quran 17:32]. Indeed this was forbidden in all the previous divinely revealed books and it has never been allowed in any religion. It is for this reason that its punishment is very severe as it is an infringement to family dignity and lineage. Hence, your husband has to immediately repent to Allaah and he should know that he will stand naked and barefooted in front of Him in a Day that is equal to 50,000 years. He has to be content with the four wives that Allaah blessed him with. Committing adultery after being married with four wives is evidence that he has a vile, contemptible and despicable soul and nature.

As regards whether or not you have the right to ask him for divorce, then if before marriage you knew that he was an adulterous person, the marriage contract is invalid according to the view point of many scholars may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them and this is the established opinion of the Hanbali school. That is because it is not permissible to marry a fornicator or adulterer and the marriage contract with him is void unless he repents as Allaah Says (which means): {The adulterer (or fornicator) does not marry except a [female] adulteress (or fornicator) or polytheist.}[Quran 24:3]. Therefore, you have to separate from him and it is forbidden for you to allow him to have sexual intercourse with you because his marriage contract with you was not valid Islamicly.

However, some scholars may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them are of the view that the marriage contract of an adulterer (or fornicator) [or [female] adulteress (or fornicator)] is valid if it fulfilled its conditions and pillars, like the presence [and consent] of the guardian, the presence of two witnesses, and the consent of the bride and bridegroom. Even according to this opinion, it is permissible for the wife to ask divorce from her adulterous husband if he does not repent because his insisting on committing adultery causes harm to her and this gives her the right to ask for divorce.

Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said: '{The adulterer (or fornicator) does not marry except a [female] adulteress (or fornicator) or polytheist.}, this is evidence that it is not permissible for an adulterer or fornicator who did not repent to marry a chaste woman. In addition to this, if he commits adultery with other women, this incites his wife to commit adultery with other men, as this is what is happening in reality. Indeed I have not seen an adulterer who commits adultery with other women except that he leads his wife to commit adultery with other men as recompense to his act and as an act of envy [from his wife]. Also, if he commits adultery with other women, other people would seek to commit adultery with his wives, and this is what happens in reality. So the wife of an adulterer will become an adulteress…'

A poet said: 'A person who commits adultery for 2,000 Dirhams, people would commit adultery with his wives without a Dirham. Therefore, you have to know that committing adultery is like a debt, so if you borrow it, then it is your wife (or wives) who would pay it back.'

Moreover, the harm that is caused by adultery, especially in these days when AIDS and other fatal diseases are widespread, could affect the innocent wife due to her adulterous husband. Indeed many wives were affected by this disease because of the husband. All these reasons give the wife the right to ask her adulterous husband for divorce. In fact some jurists may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them stated that the wife has a right to ask for divorce in cases of smaller harms than that resulted from adultery, like when the husband beats her and the like. Khaleel may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him from the Maaliki school said: 'The wife has the right to ask for divorce when she is harmed.' Additionally, Ibn Farhoon may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said: 'Among the harms that are caused to the wife is the husband's refusal to speak to her, or turning away from her in bed and preferring another woman [in respect and esteem] than her, and beating her severely…'

Therefore, all what is mentioned in the above statement is less harmful to the wife than the harm of the husband who commits adultery, as this could lead to other men committing adultery with his wife (or wives) or his daughters, or that their reputation [wife and daughters] becomes denigrated and they become a subject of shame among the people.

Allaah Knows best.

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