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A wife reminding her husband and children of her favors towards them

Question

Assallam u alaikum, A husband has depression and can't work so the wife has to work and pay the bills and rent and support him and their two children. They also get money from the government which covers the rent and some of the bills. The wife often complains and reminds the husband of all she is doing especially when she gets stressed or when the children are disobedient. The husband says the money belongs to the whole family not just her. Is there sin on her for this and should she repent? Should she stop complaining as it is her duty.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

The husband is obliged to provide for his wife and children according to his ability. If the husband does not work and the wife goes out to work in order to help her husband to pay for the expenses of the house, then this is evidence of her good character, and she will have a great reward from Allaah, The Almighty. Please refer to Fatwa 92004.

The wife is not obliged to work to provide for them. As regards the husband saying that this money is for the family, if he is referring to the government contribution, then this is based on the terms and conditions of the government on such a contribution. However, if he is referring to the money that his wife earns from working, then her money is an exclusive right of hers.

On the other hand, if the wife complains and gets annoyed, this does not necessarily make her sinful, but she should not do so as this could cause her to lose the reward of her good deeds if she reminds her husband and her children of her favors towards them. Allaah says (what means): {O you who have believed, do not invalidate your charities with reminders or injury.}[Quran 2:264]

Allaah Knows best.

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