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Wife contacting parents without husband's knowledge

Question

I live in the USA, and my parents live in Pakistan. They miss me very much. I do not have a phone. My husband does, but sometimes he is too busy to attend my parents' calls. My mother mailed me a cell phone with a connection, but my husband returned it. My parents are old, and I have not met them in five years. I have some money; can I buy a cell phone and not tell my husband? And can I talk with my parents through that phone? I am scared that my parents die and that I could not even talk with them. My husband does not allow me to talk in WhatsApp or Skype. Please answer my question: can I secretly buy a cell phone to talk my parents? Please help me. May Allah reward you.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Part of dutifulness and kindness towards the parents is to communicate with them and ask about their conditions. The husband should be helpful to his wife about this in order to keep good marital relations and earn the affection of his wife. Undoubtedly, this helps in keeping the stability of the family and bringing happiness to it.

If your husband has no valid reason to prevent you from buying a cell phone, then there is no harm on you in buying this phone and contacting your parents, even without his knowledge, because it is not permissible for him to prevent you from doing so.

The wife's obedience to her husband is not obligatory in all cases; rather, there are limits to it which the scholars have clarified so that the husband would not take advantage of his guardianship over his wife to transgress against her. For benefit on the limits of obedience of a wife to her husband, please refer to fatwas 89815 and 133365.

However, we advise you to reach a mutual understanding with your husband on the subject to convince him of your right to contact your parents so that he will be aware of that.

Allah knows best.

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