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Homosexual Thoughts and Desires

Question

Assalamu Alykum Dear Sheikh I’m a teenage Muslim living in the UK. I would like to ask some questions regarding homosexuality. I’m 20 years old and I frequently have homosexual thoughts. Ever since I can remember I have been attracted to males more than females. I am aware that homosexuality is completely forbidden and is worse than (Zinah) Adultery. I also know that it is one of the greatest sins for a Muslim to be a homosexual. My brain and logic completely reject homosexuality and I can never condone the idea, however this is my brain …but unfortunately my sexual desires and my inner feelings are out of my control; the more I try to suppress them, the greater the urge becomes. I have never been involved in any homosexual act of any sort…it is mainly thoughts, dreams and sexual lusts and desires that I get. I have never touched a male in a sexual way and, insha-Allah, never will. I know that I need help…this disease keeps me in a continual state of depression. Every night before I go to sleep I wonder that if I die before the morning will I go to hell!!! I have the following question: 1- Does having homosexual urges and desires and not being involved in homosexual physical acts (sexual intercourse), mean that I will be classified as a gay (Looti) and am I sinning by having homosexual feelings? Something which is out of my control? 2- Did any one ever approach the Prophet (saws) and ask him about homosexuality? How did he solve it? 3- What are the cures for homosexuality? What can I do to avoid it? My dear brother, I desperately need your help this is a serious problem and I feel lost. Please reply as soon as you can – Jazakum Allah Khayra Your Brother

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Dear brother, bad thoughts are the result of badly used leisure time. Some times one amuses himself in erotic things. This results in bad thoughts. He should turn towards Allah in repentance and perform acts of worship and good deeds as much as possible. He should ask Almighty Allah to protect him from all bad thoughts and acts. Homosexuality is a big crime inherited from the people of Prophet Lot. Because of the enormity of this sin, a severe punishment struck them. Some jurists believe that the punishment of homosexuality should be more severe than the one reserved for adultery. The man is inclined to the female and vice versa. This is how Allah created us. Anybody who tries to go against this goes against Allah’s will. Some scholars say that the evilness of this crime is lesser than the one of the Kufr. Perhaps it is greater than murder. Allah did not afflict any one by this big crime before the people of Lot.

Allah Says (what means):

• {And [We had sent] Lot when he said to his people, "Do you commit such immorality as no one has preceded you with from among the worlds?.} [Quran 7:80]

• {Do you approach males among the worlds.} [Quran 26:165]

A scholar said: “If Allah had not mentioned this crime in His Book (the Quran), I would not have imagined that a male may go unto a male.

Allah inflicted punishments of many kinds on them: He showered stones on them, made them blind, and turned their houses upside down, etc. All these punishments were not but for the enormity of this crime. You should know that being murdered by a man is better than having homosexual intercourse with him. Because having sex with a man kills one’s humanity. Afterwards, there is no hope of a usual life. Unlike a murder, he would be a Martyr.

Khalid ibn al-Waleed  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him wrote to Abu Baker  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him that he found a man among some Arabs who was sexually used by some others as if he were a woman. Abu Baker  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him gathered the Companions and took their advice; Ali  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him said: “No nation has committed this great sin other than one, and all of you know, how Allah punished them. I think he should be burnt by fire. Then Abu Baker  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him wrote to Khalid to burn him with fire. Khalid  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him did what was written to him. Ibn Abbas  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him said: “A highest place should be searched, then the Sodomite should be thrown down on his head and followed by stones (Rajm). Ibn Abbas  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him deduced this opinion from the punishment of Allah inflicted on the people of Lot.
The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “If you find any person doing the act of the people of Lot, then kill them both.” The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) cursed the sodomites three times. He did not curse any other wrong doers three times.

2 - No one came to Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) asking him about homosexuality. On the contrary a person sought permission of adultery from the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ). The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) asked the man. Do you like it for your mother? He replied: “No”. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “Likewise, people do not like it for their mothers.” Then, he said: “Do you like it for your sister?” He said: “No” Then the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “The people do not like it for their sisters either…” etc.

To chase away these bad thoughts, we recommend the following:

1 – The motive to seek a cure for this problem should be solely following Allah’s orders and fearing His punishment.
2 – A permanent and quick cure for this problem lies in marriage. One should get married as soon as possible.
3 – Keeping oneself busy in what is good for this world and the Hereafter life.
4 – Lowering the gaze from looking at forbidden things such as pictures, movies etc. May Allah protect all of us.

For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 340615, 92314, 90562, 82048, and 81381.

Allah knows best.

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