What Ails Women who Act like Men? - II

24/07/2012| IslamWeb

• Mass media and blind imitation:

People imitate and internalize what is depicted on television through serials and movies. Such media spreads misleading and deviated ideas that tempt women and encourage them to rebel against religion and sound principles and to reject the guardianship of men, and ask for their "freedom". They also display indecent clothes that are similar to men’s wear in the name of fashion.

Many women are affected by what is presented in the mass media and they consequently rebel against religion, morals and the guardianship of men. They imitate the morals of dissolute women and their attitudes without thinking or distinguishing between good and evil. Hence, women who are dressed and behave like men have emerged in recent times. This is the result of blind imitation and weakness of their personality and as a consequence of not being proud of their religion.

• Bad company:

The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “One adopts the habits and ways of his friend, so be careful with whom you make friends.” Bad companions, undoubtedly, have a great effect on growing girls as they acquire bad qualities and corrupt morals from them. For instance, the girl who accompanies boyish girls is affected by the way they dress or behave, so as not to appear strange or odd among them. Hence, parents should be careful and choose righteous girls who are engaged in beneficial activities such as going to Quran centers and mosques to be the companions of their daughters.

• A feeling of inferiority and the desire to attract attention:

If a girl suffers from lack of friends or feels inferior, she would do anything to attract the attention of people. If a girl’s physical appearance has something that resembles men and as a result, if any of her family or friends mocks her for this, she will have no self-confidence and this will lead her to imitate men. In such cases, parents are advised to be gentle towards girls and shower them with love and compassion so that they would not seek the approval and appreciation of strangers, such as evil-minded people who would corrupt them and take advantage of them.

• Lack of Positive Role Models:

Being around good role models is one of the most important factors that contribute towards righteous upbringing. Sometimes the mother might act in an unfeminine manner herself and her daughters would naturally imitate her as girls usually acquire their personalities from their mothers. For instance, if the mother undermines the authority of her husband and does not respect him, most probably her daughters would not appreciate their husbands either. Similarly, if the mother is loud-mouthed in her speech and raises her voice, her daughter will acquire this attribute. This also applies to imitating men and any other characteristic.

• Lack of protective zeal on the part of her husband or guardian:

Some men do not prevent their women from violating the orders of Allah The Almighty regarding Hijab (Islamic covering) and they do not feel any sense of protectiveness even when the women in their guardianship behave improperly. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “Three (types of people) will not enter Paradise and Allah will not look at them on the Day of Judgment: the one who is undutiful to his parents, the woman who imitates men and the Dayyooth (a man who approves of indecency among his womenfolk).”

Aspects of assuming a masculine attitude:

Nowadays, women have started to imitate men in more than one aspect. This imitation is no longer restricted to the way they dress, but it includes many other aspects; some of these are:

• Imitating men in the way they dress: Women have started to wear clothes that are similar to those of men, such as trousers. Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, said that the Messenger of Allah  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “Cursed is the man who wears the clothes of women and the woman who wears the clothes of men.” Women also imitate men by wearing footwear that are similar to what men wear. ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, was asked about the woman who wears the sandals of men, so she said: “The Messenger of Allah  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) cursed the women who assume a masculine attitude.”

Unfortunately, nowadays, there are many shoes that have unusual shapes that any sensible man would disdain from wearing, nevertheless, many women buy them.

• Intermixing with men in markets and public places: Some women do not feel shy about standing in the same line with men, sitting beside them, especially in shops, or speaking with salesmen as if they were her Mahram (non-marriageable) men.

• Speaking loudly and arguing with men: Some women speak in a loud voice that could be heard by any one even though women are known for their low and gentle voices and it is known that they should avoid speaking with non-Mahram (marriageable) men.

• Imitating men in the way they walk, move and the way they have their hair cut: Some women walk like men in the way they stride and make the same movements of men that show strength and toughness. Some of them have even taken up traditionally male sports like Karate, weightlifting, track and field events and football in an attempt to imitate men.

• Toughness in dealing with others: Some women behave like men with their relatives. They are stubborn; bad tempered and do not talk respectfully or appreciatively with anyone. These qualities are dispraised when they are adopted by men, let alone women.

• Abandoning adornment that is peculiar to women such as Henna and Kuhl. This makes women similar to men in the way they look. ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said, “A woman made a sign from behind a curtain to indicate that she had a letter for the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ). The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) closed his hand, saying: ‘I do not know whether this is a man's or a woman's hand.’ She said, ‘No, a woman.’ He said: ‘If you were a woman, you would have different nails (because of the Henna you apply).’”

• Refusing the authority of men or the care of the guardian: Some women do not accept to be under the guardianship of a man, but they want absolute freedom without taking permission or consulting their guardian.

Women who assume a masculine attitude and abandon modesty become like a tree that does not have its bark and will soon die. Masculine women speak with anybody about anything, and go everywhere without being bashful. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) said: “The following statement belonging to the early prophets is from among what the people have retained, ‘If you do not feel shy, then, do whatever you like.’”

What Ails Women who Act like Men? - I

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