I Cannot Make Up for the Missed Days in Previous Ramadan

I Cannot Make Up for the Missed Days in Previous Ramadan

Question

In the Name of Allah, The Most Merciful, The Ever Merciful
My question is: I reached puberty when I was 9 years old, and I barely fasted the month of Ramadan. My family did not assign much care whether I carried out the obligatory prayers or not. I did not make up for the missed days in Ramadan and I did not even know whether it was obligatory to make up for the missed days in Ramadan.
My mother even used to prevent me from making up for the missed days because I used to suffer from iron-deficiency anaemia, but I have fully recovered now from this illness. I tried last year to make up for the missed days of the last Ramadan, but I fasted only two separate days and could not fast any more. My intention was sincere to Allah, but I could not make up for the missed days; I feel very tired and hungry while fasting. I experience painful cramps to the extent that I have to put my hands on my stomach and lean forward out of pain. Whenever I walk to a room, the bathroom, or the kitchen, I feel extremely tired and feel the urge to sit down out of tiredness, in a way that I have never experienced in my life. Therefore, I no longer make up for the missed days. Fasting Ramadan is really hard for me, but I endure it because everyone around me is fasting, however, I feel terribly thirsty and physically worn out. I am so tired while fasting to the extent that I cannot perform some prayers while standing. I feel that I am unable to fulfil the due rights of Allah The Exalted over me. I feel that I have failed to fulfil the due obligations of Allah The Exalted, but I do not know what to do. Is what I am experiencing devilish whispers, although I do not think so? Please advise me.
Answer
In the Name of Allah, The Most Merciful,The Ever Merciful
Dear sister,
Assalaamu ‘Alaykum,
Bear in mind, sister, that the devil has many gateways to the heart –
one of which is procrastination and fostering hopes of a long life. Some people call it the greatest obstacle that always hinders their progress in life. It is a mental block, driving one to postpone what he aspires to achieve and have hopes of a prolonged life. Such a person may live and die without accomplishing anything in his life and without even starting to pursue his dreams and aims in life! Remember, dear sister that the ultimate goal of the devil is to prevent you from doing good deeds and obeying Allah The Exalted. Indeed, this is one of the devil's gravest gateways to the hearts of pious people.
Ibn Al-Jawzi  may  Allah  have  mercy  upon  him wrote in his book Talbees Iblees,
“Many people are determined to carry out good deeds, but have been lured by the devil and incited to adopt procrastination. Many seekers of virtue and goodness are disheartened in their pursuits in life by the devil! Satan would whisper to you that you are perfect and that you are better than other people. The devil would foster feelings of superiority within your heart by reminding you that you perform prayers while others do not pray at all and that you fast while others do not. Thus, you start to look down upon other people and feel superior to those who carry out lesser good deeds. This evil plot aims at thwarting you and discouraging you from performing righteous deeds. The devil would incite you to abstain from doing good deeds with the excuse that you are busy or sick. In fact, one should look up to those who are more active in performing acts of worship and follow their footsteps. One should vie with those who do good deeds more than he should do in the race to goodness.
I advise you, my sister, to consult a doctor. If you suffer from a disease that prevents you from fasting, then you are excused for not fasting. However, if you are not sick, then these are devilish whispers and one of Satan’s gateways to the heart. Some useful ways to ward off these devilish whispers are the following:
1 – You should repent to Allah The Exalted and turn to Him in submission.
2 – You should believe in Allah The Exalted, and put your trust in your Lord only. The devil has no actual power or control over those who believe and trust in their Lord.
3 – You should occupy yourself with the remembrance of Allah and seek refuge in Him from the accursed Satan all the time. Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {And if an evil suggestion comes to you from Satan, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is Hearing and Knowing.} [Quran 7:200]
Dear sister, recite the Chapter (Surah) As-Sajdah and the reported supplication of Ibn ‘Abbaas, may Allah be pleased with him. He said, “If you feel distress, say “O Lord, You are The First and The Last, The Ascendant (over all) and The Immanent (Knower of hidden things), and You are over all things Competent.”
May Allah help you and guide you to the right path.
May Allah grant us success.

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