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Her husband took his mother’s side over her mother

Question

My mother-in-law said something to my mother that I did not like. After several months I told my husband. My husband said that she can say anything that she wants. I said that no one has the right to say whatever they want, only those who are mentally deficinit (they dont know what they are saying). He got mad and said I have insulted his mother, though that was not my intention. I think he should ask his mother from refraining to comment about such things ( it concerned finacial matter). Am I wrong in this. Though I have not said anything to his mother about it and still talk to her but this instance has not been the first. Thanks

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.

It is better for you, dear sister, not to tell your husband about what you dislike of his mother's speech; because this may provoke his anger against you or her, and there is evil in both cases. It is out of kind companionship that neither of the spouses should face the other with any speech which may harm him/her in his/her own self or his/her relatives, and that both should overlook the faults and slips of each other.

What you have mentioned about mental deficiency or so, even if you did not intend your husband’s mother, may hurt his feelings, taking into consideration the context in which it was said. Of course, none has the right to say whatever he wants except within the limits of Sharee‘ah.

However, we advise you, in the future, not to tell your husband about what his mother says, nor to upset your marital life by mentioning the mistakes which may come from your or his family. Rather be keen to deal with his mother kindly and leniently, and you will find the good consequence of that, Allaah willing, in the World and the Hereafter.

Allaah Knows best.

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