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Arab Man Wants to Marry Her But He Is Engaged to Cousin Whom He Doesn't Like

Question

An Arab man has asked me to marry him, but he is engaged to his cousin. He does not wish to marry her, saying that if he does marry her it would be unfair to her as he does not want her and their relationship could never be happy as they don't even get along now. He would marry her to please his family especially his mother. He can have many wives but only have 1 set of parents and I told him he should obey their wishes. He believes they will accept me in time, but I am not comfortable with this as I respect his parents the same way as I respect my own. I am a non-Arab, born Muslim and my parents and theirs. I am south African citizen whose forefathers were Arab and Indian. I am so confused. I do not want to marry and then divorce. He is a good Muslim, and he has good intentions. If he sincerely cannot have a life with his fiancee, is it possible he could marry me? This man has sincere intentions but what should I do?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

You should make an inquiry about the person who has proposed to marry you, to verify his obedience to the rulings of Islam and his conduct. If both conditions are sufficient, you may accept his proposal and you are not responsible for his leaving the girl to whom he had proposed before. Prophet Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “If a man whose religion and moral conduct are pleasing to you proposes to you, then let him marry; otherwise there will be great mischief and corruption on earth.” [Al-Tirmithi]

Allah knows best.

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