Man wants to marry but parents object
Fatwa No: 83393

Question

I am 21 years old and I found a young Muslimah who I want to marry. My mother objets because she wears the Hijab (not modern). My parents also say she is from poor family whose parents are divorced. In addition, my mother says my older sister is not married and I have to wait until she marries. What do you advise in this case?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

 

Your mother’s reasons for preventing you from marrying this girl are not convincing and do not comply with Sharee’ah rules.

Indeed a Muslim man should marry a pious woman, i.e. the woman who abides strictly by the Orders of Allah, like wearing Hijab and other duties. So, the two reasons your mother has put forward are not acceptable. Firstly, Hijab is a symbol of the pious Muslim woman. Secondly, being the daughter of a family separated by divorce does not influence the predestination of Allah, as Allah Says (what means): {And no bearer of burdens shall bear another’s burden,…} [Quran 35:18]

Know also that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said while explaining the characteristics of the good Muslim woman who is liable to be married: “Choose the religious one, you will prosper.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

So, we believe that it is lawful for you to marry this girl. But, we advise you to be patient and try to convince your parents before undertaking any decision. Remind them of the Prophet’s recommendations about marrying the good pious woman and his recommendation for the young people to marry as soon as they can, …etc. we hope that your mother will finally accept your decision to marry this girl. May Allah guide us all to the right path.

Allah Knows best.

Related Fatwa