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Got acquainted before proposing marriage by cell phone contacts

Question

I am currently involved in a relationship with a Muslimah through SMS message. It's taking us far, and I just proposed to her through SMS. My worry is that I love her so much, but the feeling of getting married to her, after being involved in such a relationship (sending sms messages) makes me feel our marriage won't last long. Can I marry her? Please help me.

Answer

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

Establishing such relations between males and females is a gate to evil and a cause of mischief. So, it is forbidden for the Muslim to undertake such relations in order to preserve one's religion and to stay away from trials and temptations. Therefore you should hasten to repent.

As regards marrying this girl, we do not believe that you should take any decision before you make Istikharah and consult pious and wise people amongst those who know her. Indeed, no person who makes Istikharah ever becomes disappointed and no one who seeks advise ever regrets. Now, if there is good in your marrying her, Allah will make that easy for you, otherwise He will make you forget about her and opt for someone else.

As for changing SMS messages with her, it does not in itself represent a Shariah objection to your marrying her and it does not necessarily cause a disruption of future married life, especially if such martial life is based on piety and fear of Allah.

Allah knows best.

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