Feels desperate to leave her unjust husband

15-11-2007 | IslamWeb

Question:

Assalam alaykum,i want to ask what should i do. i am married to a man who lied to me mayn things before the marriage and deceived me about himself and after the marriage he is completely different to me.I found out he had zina relationship during our marriage. he confessed too.he doesnt give me my rights as a wife-comes home only to eat and sleep.other time is out for work and friends. he has another wife whom he gives more rights than me. for example, he gave her a car, more money, better living conditions,etc.Unless i call him and beg him, he wont come home to me.and im extremely lonely and depressed.i want to ask him for divorce.but the question is where do i go after divorce?because i am revert and my parents (non-muslims) wont let me come home. their country is very unsafe for a lonely muslim woman.i dotn have any financial means either,so i am in a desperate situation.I feel i am losing my iman in this marriage,so i must go away frm him.how can i find a new husband when im still married to another?

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

 

First of all, all perfect praise be to Allaah, Who guided you to Islam and we ask Him to make you firm and steadfast on His Religion until the day you meet Him. We also ask Him to make a way out to your difficulties and facilitate your affairs.

If the situation with your husband is as you mentioned in the question, then this is contrary to the Order of Allaah to the Muslim husband to treat his wife kindly. Hence, you have the right to ask for divorce if you are harmed.

However, you should not hasten to ask for divorce unless you are sure that divorce is better for you. It might be that being patient with your husband and trying to make him righteous is better than divorce; for more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 88526.

If we presume that divorce takes place, then you should seek the help of the Muslim community in your area to solve your problem and help you find a pious husband.

Finally, the two following matters should be mentioned:

1-    You should be very cautious and careful in choosing a husband and make sure that the person who proposes to you is religious and has a good moral conduct.

2-    A person who committed adultery is obliged to conceal his sin and not inform anyone about it, whether his wife or anyone else. It is also not permissible for any other person to try to find out about this if Allaah has concealed his sin.

Allaah Knows best.

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