This relationship has nothing to do with love for the sake of Allaah

23-5-2011 | IslamWeb

Question:

I'm a 41 year old married woman, I have a male friend, also married. Both of us were friends since schooling age. We admire and love each other at that time but we were not fated to get married. Now we concern for each other and we love each other but just spiritual, only for the sake of Allah, because he is a good man. We always get each other's opinion, seek advice, reminding each other for a better person and sharing any progress in our life. We interact mostly through internet and we do not aim of getting married and never had that intention in mind. We love our spouse very much and carry our responsibilities to our own family as we should. If we met, usually only once a year with some of our children, going out for lunch. We respect each other, we keep our distance, we are not touching hands or anything more than that. Our spouse didn't know of this relationship although they know each other, as we didn't want to hurt anybody or misunderstood. However we still need each other as soul mate, we find very peaceful after communicating. What is Islam view on this kind of relationship? Thank you.

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

This kind of relationship which leads to what is mentioned in the question, like corresponding on the internet or direct meetings in the manner which you described is a means that may lead to committing what is forbidden, and seriously open the door to temptation, while Allaah forbade following the steps of the devil as He Says (what means): {O you who have believed, do not follow the footsteps of Satan. And whoever follows the footsteps of Satan — indeed, he enjoins immorality and wrongdoing.}[Quran 24:21]

This matter is even more abominable if it happens between a man and a woman who both are already married. If a man is blessed with a wife and if a woman is blessed with a husband, then he/she has competed the other half of his/her religion, so he/she should fear Allaah in the other half, as stated in an authentic Hadeeth.

To conclude, both of you must immediately stop this relationship and repent to Allaah, otherwise you may end up doing something you would regret when it is too late. Indeed, this has nothing to do with the love for the sake of Allaah as the Sharee’ah does not approve of such a relationship or such meetings between a man and a non-Mahram woman.

Also, the consultation and advice and other matters which you mentioned in the question between you and that man is something that should happen between a husband and his wife and this would lead them to have more affection towards each other and good marital relationship, but not between a man and a non-Mahram woman. For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 84833 and 84544.

Allaah Knows best.

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