Many problems with second wife

6-7-2002 | IslamWeb

Question:

I am 38 years old. I have 4 children. My husband married another woman 6 month ago and he left with her just one month and she lives in Lebanon and I live in Denmark. He can't bring her to Denmark and he already has work in this country and he can travel to Lebanon just one month in a year. After this second marriage we had many problems and her rune that he made a big mistake with this marriage. He is angry about that. He can't find himself with the second woman so he decided to divorce her without causing problems to her and me and also himself (Imsakon bi Maarouf aw Tasrihon bi Ihsan). Please answer me because I am we are in very bad situation.

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Answer:

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the World; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

The preponderant opinion is that divorcing is dislikeable, if there is no genuine necessity; the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "Of all the lawful acts the most detestable to Allah is divorce" . [ Abu Dawood and al-Hakim ]. Though the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) considered it Halal, but it would be detestable to Allah if there were no need. If there is any need it will not be considered detestable. Detestable means any act in Shari'a if one avoids it gets reward and if acts upon it does not subject to any punishment.
Therefore, we advise our noble brother, not to take the decision of divorce in haste, rather he should weigh the benefits and harms that result from the divorce. If he concludes that there is no harm whether the martial ties remain or cut off, it is better to keep the martial ties to avoid harming the wife without any reason. If there is any harm to each one of them, the divorce is permissible as confirmed by the scholars.
Finally, we remind the wife that forcing her husband to divorce her co-wife is forbidden. We advise her to fear Allah in this case and in all matters.
Allah knows best.