Criteria of the successful marriage

28-11-2005 | IslamWeb

Question:

Marriages work best when couples are from the same background, race and religion. What is your opinion in that? Please write to me by Arabic and English.

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First of all, it should be noted that the criteria for choosing a spouse are religion and good moral conduct, and there is no consideration as to other differences like money, having a high status in the society, and the like. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: "If a man whose religion and moral character are pleasing proposes to marry your daughter, then marry her off to him. Otherwise there will be great mischief and corruption on earth." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) further said in another narration: "Choose the religious one, you will prosper." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

So, if the spouses match in family lineage and social status and the like, subsequently, good marital relationship and harmony between them may be achieved. However, this is not a condition in marrying; rather it is not permissible for these factors to be an obstacle in marriage. Some disputes and troubles may happen even though the spouses have the same family lineage and the like. On the contrary, affection, love and harmony may prevail between the spouses even with the difference in the family lineage and the like.

Finally, it should be noted that it is not permissible for a Muslim to marry a non-Muslim unless she is from the People of the Book [a Christian or a Jew] and provided she is chaste. Allaah Says (which means): {And do not marry Al-Mushrikaat (idolatresses, etc.) till they believe (worship Allaah Alone).}[Quran 2:221]. Allaah further Says (which means): {This day [all] good foods have been made lawful, and the food of those who were given the Scripture is lawful for you and your food is lawful for them. And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you.}[Quran 5:5].

However, it is not permissible at all for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man, be him from the people of the book or else. Allaah Says (which means): {And give not (your daughters) in marriage to Al-Mushrikun [polytheists, pagans, idolaters, disbelievers] till they believe (in Allaah Alone)}[Quran 2:221].

For more details, please refer to Fataawa 8601682095 and 86911.

Allaah Knows best.

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