Husband Asking His Wife for Sex While in Someone Else's House

19-4-2006 | IslamWeb

Question:

When my husband calls me to his bed, am I allowed to reject his call because I do not feel comfortable in doing so due to our surroundings? For example, we may be guests at someone house, or when I know it may be possible for others to hear what goes on between us?
Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

A woman is not allowed to refuse her husband's request to enjoy her if there is no Islamically valid reason as we mentioned in our Fatwa 84944. Merely being guests or fearing that someone may hear what is going on during intercourse does not justify a wife refusing to fulfill her husband's desire. Nevertheless, if she feels uncomfortable then she has to convince her husband, and at the same time, a husband should respect the feelings of his wife as much as possible.

Finally, we draw your attention to the fact that one should observe the etiquettes of having sex; some of which are cited by Ibn Qudaamah may Allaah have mercy upon him who said:

“One should not have sex with his wife while others can see them or hear their sound, and he should not kiss her or have sex with her in the presence of others. Imam Ahmad may Allaah have mercy upon him said: ‘I like that all such matters be concealed.’ Al-Hassan al-Basri may Allaah have mercy upon him said about a man who has sex with his wife while another wife could hear what is going on: ‘They (the righteous predecessors) disliked hearing an intimate sound [i.e. the sound that can be heard when spouses are having sex].” [End of quote]

Allah knows best.

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