Her husband refuses to divorce her without taking compensation

29-4-2007 | IslamWeb

Question:

my husband is refusing to give me talaak just to punish me. he has agreed for the court divorce though. we have not been living together for the past 8 months n hes staying with another woman who he had an affair with, thus the reason for our separation. now he wants money from me n threatens that unless i give me half of my weath, he wont give me a talaak. beleive me, ive approached many isl organisation, granting a khula is not an easy process. it sounds easy, but wen a woman ask for a khula, the ulamas have a field day. im so frustrated i dont know where to turn to. ive submitted all doc n answered all question but still i feel because im a woman, i have to be patient n wait. my ex has been summoned n did not appear. the muslim council tell me they will keep calling him. n this may take months if not years. im at my wits ends. pls advise

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

 

You did not clarify to us whether that woman became his second wife or he is still in illegal relationship with her. If she is his wife, it is not permissible for you to ask for divorce just because of this reason as he is Islamically permitted to marry a second wife. For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 88007 and 83644.

However, if he lives with her illegally, [i.e. without marrying her] then he should be advised that it is forbidden for him to continue this relationship with this woman, as this advise may lead him to repent and cut the relationship with her, and then the reasons of dispute between you and him will be over.

Nonetheless, if he insists on this illegal and illicit relationship, you are permitted to ask him to divorce you and it is not permissible for him to keep you hanging (neither divorced nor married) just in order to harm you as this is an injustice. Allaah Says (what means): {…and do not keep them, intending harm, to transgress [against them]. And whoever does that has certainly wronged himself.}[Quran 2:231]. He is obliged either to keep you in kindness or divorce you in kindness.

We advise you to continue contacting the Islamic council in your country, and you may seek the help of some of your relatives, or some trustworthy people to urge the people who are running the council to try to remove the harm off you [by getting you a divorce from your husband]. Nevertheless, you should be patient and earnestly supplicate Allaah to make a way out to your difficulty.

As regards Khul' (to ask for divorce in return for compensation), the scholars  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them stated that if it is the wife who is disobedient, then it is permissible for her husband to take compensation from her even if it is more than the dowry provided she agrees to it, and if this does not cause harm to her. However, if it is the husband who is disobedient, and the wife gives him money out of fear to be harmed by him or due to him being unjust to her or due to him harming her, then it is not permissible for him to take compensation and if he had taken from her something on this basis, he should give it back to her.  

Anyway, if your husband insists on the money and you are not greatly harmed by giving it to him, then it might be good for you to give it to him in order to obtain divorce from him and the harm will be removed off you if it cannot be removed except by divorce.

Of course, all the above is based on the fact that your husband did not initiate divorce to you, because if he uttered divorce to you, then it is valid even if the procedures of the court are not yet finished.  

Allaah Knows best.

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