Wife asking husband to provide her with Internet to contact her mother

30-9-2009 | IslamWeb


Assalamu alaykum. My mother and me are reverted muslimas. My husband works in islamic country, myself and my kids are going there also. My mother stays alone in non-muslim country, feeling not able to join us. I asked my husband to provide us Internet possibility there to be able to have regular contact with my mom through messengers, but he refuses, says that to go each week once to an Internet coffee to talk is sufficient. With 3 small kids Internet Coffee is not possible, we tried previously with 2 kids, but it disturbed the people there, it was very tensed, my mom couldn't see my face, kids made noices there and it was not a regular contact. Should my husband provide in this case Internet at home? What is my mom's right - how often she can see her grandchildren and me? Assalamu alaykum.


All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.


First of all, we congratulate you and your mother on embracing Islam, and may Allaah reward you for your keenness to maintain relations with your mother and to be dutiful to her. This is what a believing woman should do.

It would be very good if your husband managed to install internet service at home in order to enable you to see your mother and she can see you. Your husband should provide it if it is not difficult for him to do so. This action improves the marital relationship between the spouses.

Nevertheless, installing internet connection is not obligatory on the husband such that he becomes sinful by neglecting it. Muslim jurists stated that the obligatory financial maintenance the husband must provide for his wife is limited to food, clothing and housing. These three elements are confirmed by the Quran and Sunnah. Concerning the divorced women, Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {Lodge them [in a section] of where you dwell out of your means and do not harm them in order to oppress them. And if they should be pregnant, then spend on them until they give birth.}[Quran 65:6] Thus, providing a house for the divorced wife is obligatory, so the wife is definitely more entitled to a house. It was narrated on the authority of Jaabir, may Allaah me pleased with him, that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said in the Khutbah of the Farewell Hajj: "It is your duty to sustain and clothe your wives reasonably." [Muslim]

However, if the internet is not installed in your house, it is sufficient to call your mother by phone. It is preferable to avoid going to the internet cafes altogether because seldom are they free from religious violations, such as free intermixing between the sexes and the presence of dissolute men there.

With regard to the right of your mother on you, it is to be dutiful to her, maintain relations with her as much as you can, and obey her in matters which do not involve disobedience to Allaah. For further information see Fataawa 82254 and 84942.

Finally, if your children are under the age of maturity, they are not religiously accountable. So, it cannot be said that they have duties towards their grandmother, but they should be raised on being dutiful and kind to her, and the grandmother should be enabled to talk to them whenever she likes.

Allaah Knows best.