Hoping to marry non-Muslim man she met online if he converts

3-1-2018 | IslamWeb

Question:

Assalaamu alaykom. I would like to know the Islamic view on this matter. I got to know someone online, but he is from a different country and totally different cultures and traditions. We talked, and there is a mutual liking between us. However, he is not Muslim! He does not belong to any denomination but he believes in one God. I know that what I did is a sin and that it is forbidden in Islam for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim. I told him that, and he is willing to read Quran and learn about Islam, and if he is convinced, he will convert. But he did not promise me anything. I am concerned about the following:
1. If he became Muslim, are we allowed to marry and will that marriage be permissible and authorized in Islam?
2. He comes from a mixed race family, and I believe that they do not belong to any of the heavenly religions. Am I allowed to be a part of that family if we marry? Or will there be certain restrictions?
3. He asked me to give him time to understand Islam. What is required from me to do to avoid committing any more sins? Should I avoid talking to him completely? If he has a question regarding Islam, should I tell him to go to a local mosque and not ask me? Should I not help him in any way throughout that period?
Thank you in advance.

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

There is no doubt that getting to know that young man through the Internet and communicating with him is immoral and a cause that leads to evil and corruption. You have to repent to Allah from that and cut off your relationship with him completely. You should beware of temptation and its causes, and you should preserve your religion and honor.

For more benefit, please refer to fatwas 81671, 81356, and 86527.

With regard to a woman calling a man to goodness – although it is permissible in principle – it involves some prohibitions. Therefore, it is more appropriate to direct him to any reliable and trustworthy Islamic organization or authority so that they would teach him the religion of Islam. If he is interested in Islam, he would endeavor to look for this himself. He may also make use and benefit from our site; we have many fatwas that introduce the religion of Islam, such as the following ones: 86091, 88906 and 173389.

If we presume that he embraces Islam and adheres to the rituals of the religion, especially the prayer, then there is no harm on you to accept him as a husband. Please refer to fatwas 17897 and 11716. However, we have to warn you that some men may pretend to enter Islam in order to achieve their desire to marry a specific woman, and once he achieves what he wishes, then his truth is revealed and bad consequences follow. Moreover, the difference of customs, traditions, and cultures, because of different countries, may be an obstacle to the continuity of the marriage.

Therefore, it is better for a Muslim woman to look for a righteous man who is religious, has a good moral conduct, and whom she aspires to be happy with, especially given that marital life is a long journey that may not be free of obstacles that require reason and wisdom to deal with.

A man asked Al-Hasan Al-Basri, “To whom shall I marry my daughter?” He replied, “To the one who fears Allah, because if he loves her, he will honor her, and if he hates her, he will not be unjust to her.

Finally, we do not know what you mean by saying, "Am I allowed to be part of that family?" If by this you mean residing with them and so on, then there is nothing wrong with that, provided that you feel safe with them and provided that you abide by the Islamic conditions in dealing with them, but it may be difficult to do so. Of course, all this is if we presume that he has become Muslim.

To conclude, our advice to you is to cut any kind of relationship with that man and not be attached to him and look for a righteous Muslim man to marry. A Muslim woman is Islamically permitted to look for a husband within the limits of the Shariah, as we have already highlighted in fatwa 82471.

Allah knows best.

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