Two schoolmates love each other but can not marry now
Fatwa No: 130051

Question

Asalam o Alakium. Im 20 years old. My name is Saleha.I really need urgent guidance. There was a very islamic tableeghi boy in my school and he was what i had always idealised as an islamic husband. So i told my mum about it and she contacted his mum. Both our parents like eachother's families but they think we are too young for nikah.Is it allowed to communicate with him via e-mails untill our nikah is finalised which will take a couple of years as it is hard to do sabr in this world full of fitnaas.He studies an a place where there are many modern girls and men can be encited so please give me a detailed ruling on this matter as soon as possible according to the Sharia. JazakAllah Khair.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

 

It is not permissible for you to contact this young man as long as you are a non-Mahram to him because it is religiously established that relationships between the sexes is forbidden before marriage. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 81356.

Indeed, such relationships are among the greatest means of affliction and they are not a means of protection against affliction.

What we may advise both of you is that each one should try to convince his family to agree to the marriage if you are at the age of marriage, or at least to conduct the marriage contract between you so that there would be no problem in contacting each other and then hasten as much as possible to consummate the marriage afterwards. In fact, studies are not an obstacle for a person to marry. 

It should be noted that it is not permissible for a Muslim to study in mixed universities [or schools] as this is also one of the means of temptation. Therefore, this young man should look for an institution where there is no such mixing between the sexes as this is safer for his religion.

Allaah Knows best.

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