Repented from Zina But Feels Disgraced When Approached for Marriage
Fatwa No: 83268

Question

I have committed adultery (Zina) awhile back and have repented from it Al Hamdulillah. My problem is every time Mom wants to introduce me to a suitable husband I feel scared and disgraced and feel the obligation to tell him what I have done although I believe that this is something between me and God .It is an Oriental expectation to have the girl still a virgin when married and it is an absolute shame to be otherwise. Please help me I have no one to talk to about this and it has been a great burden on my shoulders to bear the thoughts that come to my mind when meeting a new groom.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

Whenever a person sincerely repents, Allah will surely accept his repentance. The one who repents towards Allah his sin is erased and he becomes like the one who did not commit the sin at all. If Allah has covered a person, then he should not uncover himself.

Therefore, the wife is not obliged to inform her husband about what she had committed. So, we advise you to return towards Allah making sincere repentance, to cover yourself and never make yourself among those who commit sins secretly and then inform others. The Prophet said: "All my nation are forgiven for their sins except those who sin openly or disclose their sins to the people. An example of such disclosure is that a person commits a sin by night and though Allah screened it from the people, he comes in the morning, and says, "O so-and-so, I did such-and-such (evil) deed last night, though he spent his night screened by his Lord (none knowing about his sin) and in the morning he removes Allah's screen from himself." [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]

If your husband discovers that you are not virgin, then you may reply to him indirectly saying that the hymen might be removed for many reasons such as menstruating frequently, jumping, etc. So, the removal of hymen does not necessarily mean the premarital practice of sex.

Allah knows best.

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