Reluctant to marry again because of her previous failed marriages
Fatwa No: 128148

Question

Salam aleikum,
There is this sister who is a revert and made hijra to an Islamic country by herself, her being the only Muslimah in her family. She is so overly positive that she thinks that all Muslims are honest and sincere, and so people take advantage of her all the time. She has been married three times and every time the husband took advantage of her money and hard work. Now she's given up and has sworn never to get married again. The question is, is it haram for a woman (or a man) to get married and divorced so many times, while the intention was really good?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

 

First of all, we congratulate this sister for embracing Islam and we ask Allaah to reward her for being keen on protecting her religion by migrating to a Muslim country.

Therefore, it is good if she thinks good of her fellow Muslims (brothers and sisters), but she should be careful because not all Muslims are the same: there are good Muslims and bad Muslims, pious Muslims and dissolute Muslims, and so forth. If someone proposes to marry her, then she should ask about him trustworthy people who know him whether or not he is pleasing in his religion and moral conduct, and then she should perform the Istikhaarah prayer about him as we clarified in Fatwa 82471.

For more benefit on the Istikhaarah prayer, please refer to Fatwa 81434.

We advise this sister to be patient and she should not despair in looking for a husband because, no doubt, she is in need of a husband who would help her in her religion and her worldly matters. If her previous marriages had failed, this does not mean that her future marriage will fail again, but she should not hasten the matter as we clarified. Furthermore, she should know that the outcome of being patient over afflictions is goodness as we clarified in Fatwa 83577.

As a matter of fact, this sister is not sinful for getting married and divorced many times. However, she should know that marriage could be an obligation on her if she fears to commit illegal sexual intercourse as we clarified in Fatwa divorced their wives">104995. In case marriage is obligatory in her regard, then she should break her oath if she finds a man who would marry her and then she should expiate for breaking her oath. Indeed, it is confirmed that the Prophet said: “I swear by Allaah, if Allaah wills, if I ever take an oath to do something and then I find that something else is better than the first, I expiate for my oath and do what is better (or do whatever is better and then expiate for my oath.)”

In any case, this sister should not absolutely refrain from marrying.

Allaah Knows best.

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