Her husband said to her 'You are my sister with respect to Muslim relation'
Fatwa No: 136327

Question

Assalam-u-Alaikum, I live in China. I want to ask question if you guide me please. One day I was talking to my husband. I am describing my discussion below In discussion my husband take the name of one girl (living close to us) and admired her Husband: In a non-muslim culture she is following the Islam very well. She cares for her salat and modesty. You should also follow her. Wife:(in jealousy) yes. After all she is your sister. Husband:(Understand she is feeling jealousy) Why are you saying this? Wife:She is muslim and all muslims are brothers and sisters. Husband:(In Joke) Then my wife is also my sister. On listening this I became very angry. That it is against the Islamic values. But my husband was insisting me that he was just joking. When I showed more anger then he also became very strict and said; Husband: I know you are my wife. But what I said it was also within the limits of Islam. I can say that I have three relations with you. 1) my wife 2) my cousin 3) My sister with respect to muslim relation. He also told me that he has studied somewhere that Hazrat Ibrahim (A.S) (He was also not sure which Prophet A.S) when went to the palace of Namrood, his (Prophet's) wife was with him (Prophet). Namrood asked who is with you. That Prophet (A.S) said my sister (In islamic relation) I have questions Question 1: In the above discussion between husband and wife the answer of the husbands were within the limits of Islam or not? Question 2: What islam says if one husband says that his wife has three relations with him 1) Wife 2) Cousin (As his wife is the daughter of his uncle) 3) With respect to general relations between muslims she is also his sister. Question 3: Story of the Prophet (A.S) stated above has some reality or not?. Please give us the answer in detail. I shall be very thankful to you.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

 

First of all, let us start with the story of Ibraaheem [Abraham] . This story is confirmed in Saheeh Al-Bukhari and Muslim, and in this story, Ibraaheem told his wife Sarah: “If this tyrant knows that you are my wife, he will snatch you away from me. So, if he asks you, tell him that you are my sister, as you are my sister in Islam, because I don’t know of any other Muslim on this land besides I and you.”

This story is evidence that it is permissible for a Muslim to say about his Muslim wife that she is his sister given the fact that she is his sister in Islam. Nevertheless, a Muslim should not say this without a necessity and it is disliked to say such a thing as Abu Daawood reported in his Sunnan that the Prophet heard someone say to his wife ‘O my sister’ and he forbade him from doing so. However, some scholars are of the view that whoever says to his wife ‘O my mother’ or ‘O my sister’ he is considered foolish. Khaleel from the Maaliki School of jurisprudence said: “A person who says (to his wife) ‘O my mother’ or ‘O my sister’ is considered foolish.”

On the other hand, in principle, it is permissible to praise someone in front of others by mentioning the good characteristics that are related to his/her religion and good moral conduct. There is no difference in this regard if it is the husband who says this to his wife, or it is the wife who says this to her husband. But if it is feared that the husband will get jealous if his wife praises a man in front of him, or a wife will get jealous if her husband praises a woman in front of her, then it is better to avoid this kind of praise.

Allaah Knows best.

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