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His mother sexually abused him when he was a child

Question

"AOA, this a memory that i kept within myself but now its bthering me alott n to tell some thing like this courage is needed and after buildin in tellin i dunt knwo how to explain it but i m trying.when i was 5 my mother used to take me on herself n remove my pants and her clthes n move me on her like sex she did this alot of times sumtime removing my pant n sometimee not at that time i didnt knew what she doing i didnt do anythng and thought maybb tihs in somethings mother do to show thier love for kids but as i m grown up now im 26 i know what that was n i m very ashamed to even think of it when ever i see my mothers face i rememeber this thing :( i tried to get it out of my head but its not :( she is my mother how can she had done that and whne she did that my father was out of country. i cant understand y she did that ddunt she know she was doing her son thats the greatest sin of all.i cant forget it and when evr i see her face i remmeber it."

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

There is no doubt that what your mother did is forbidden and she was wrong and sinful for doing so because this matter is only permitted between a husband and his wife. However, even if she was wrong by doing that, the matter does not reach the extent of Zina (adultery or fornication) which necessitates a Hadd (i.e. the corporal punishment determined by the Islamic Law) on its doer because Zina is defined by the jurists as an adult male deliberately penetrating his penis in the vagina of a woman without a valid marriage or a marriage of doubtful validity.

Therefore, we advise you to endeavour to forget this matter and seek refuge in Allaah from the devil when you remember it. The devil may remind you of this (by whispering to you) so that he will preoccupy you from what benefits you in your religion and worldly matters and subsequently spoil your life. Rather, you should think that your mother might have repented from this act or that Allaah might have forgiven her because of some good deeds that wipe out the sins, like seeking forgiveness and performing good deeds and the like, or due to calamities that wipe out the sins.

Therefore, if it happens that you look at your mother and remember that matter, then say to yourself: "May Allaah forgive you, mother”, and endeavour to be kind and dutiful to her and you should also know that such conduct from her does not exempt you from being kind and dutiful to her.

For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 125210.

Allaah Knows best.

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