Muslim man trying to convert girl to Islam
Fatwa No: 352459

Question

Assalaamu alaykum Brothers and Sisters and whoever reads my question. Please do not quickly judge me, and be merciful in your answer. I love a girl; we met online four years ago, and she lives in the USA. She is a very polite girl with good manners, and the only thing she is missing is to convert to Islam. She loves me as well, and I have promised her that I will go to the US. Due to some reasons, we stopped talking, and after that she had another boyfriend who she lives with. He is a non-Muslim as well. The years passed and I moved to USA, and as you guessed, the main reason was because of her. We met once in a public place, with pure intentions and without committing any sins, praise be to Allaah, unless meeting her was a sin in itself. She told me that she is not in love with her boyfriend and that she is only with him because she did not want to be alone. Please do not quickly judge her and keep in your mind that she is not Muslim, so having a boyfriend is ok in her culture. Now the both of us see that we have a bright future together. She is also really interested in Islam, and with me teaching her, she will convert, Allaah willing. God knows that my only intention is to lawfully marry her and take her hands from ignorance to Islam and save her soul, Allaah willing. Now, according to Islamic law, am I suppose to continue in that? If yes, is it haram to ask her to leave her boyfriend even though she does not want to be with him? Please be patient with my questions, as I know that some of them will sound ignorant to you, but you need to look at the outcome, as I am trying to convert a non-Muslim girl to Islam and marry her.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

We ask Allah, The Almighty, to guide this girl to the straight path and to embracing Islam, and to facilitate your marriage to her. It was narrated on the authority of Ibn ‘Abbaas  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, "There is nothing like marriage for two people who love each other." [Ibn Maajah]

Your keenness on guiding this girl to Islam is a good thing, and we hope that Allah grants you what you wish for and rewards you generously for that. There is no doubt that whoever guides others to any righteous deed earns equal rewards to the ones who do that deed. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, "By Allah, if one man is guided to the right path through you, it would be better for you than the (most precious) red camels." However, this commendable intention does not justify befriending this girl. It is impermissible for the Muslim man to have female friends; Allah, The Exalted, says (what means): {...desiring chastity, not unlawful sexual intercourse or taking (secret) lovers.} [Quran 5:5]

Inviting this girl to Islam does not necessarily entail befriending her. It is permissible for the Muslim man to invite non-Muslim women to Islam provided that he abides by the relevant teachings of Islam; avoiding whatever may lead to Fitnah (temptation), such as being alone with her and the like. It is better in all cases that a woman invites another woman to Islam; this is safer and farther from Fitnah. Therefore, we advise you to seek a righteous Muslim woman who can invite her to Islam, or you may refer her to an Islamic center in that country. You can also give her some Islamic publications and audio materials that explain true Islam. Please, refer to fatwas 88997 and 85379.

If Allah guided her to Islam and you were able to marry her, then this is the desired objective; otherwise, you should cut off your relationship with her and stop thinking about her, for there are many women other than her. You should not be deceived by such online encounters, and the character that this girl displays may be contrary to her real character. You stated that it is socially accepted for her to have a boyfriend in her culture; however, such friendships allow them to commit the worst of sins (adultery) without any social objection to it.

Lastly, we would like to draw your attention to the fact that our compassion and mercy towards you urges us to give you advice, as enjoined by the Sharia. Tameem Ad-Daari  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him narrated that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, "This religion is founded on the sincere exchange of advice..." Indeed, the one who refrains from advising his fellow Muslims is considered to be deceiving them; Qataadah  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said, "You would not meet your fellow believer except as an advice-giver, and you would not meet him as a deceiver."

Allah knows best.

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