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Fatwa CenterHer Husband Talks to his Mother Daily
Question
Salaam aleykom wa rahmatulah wa barakatuh, My husband and I live far from my in laws. However my husband calls his mother daily or she calls him. They use the webcam and chat daily for about 1 hour. I do not have a problem when his father is talking with my husband. But I feel uncomfortable when he chats with his mother on daily basis. For me, it feels like she's controlling him. Therefore, this daily chatting makes me sick. Every evening is the same and we fight about it very often. I complained many times but my husband doesn't understand my feelings. He told me that I have a problem. I know that he must keep ties with his family but this daily long chat every evening with his mother, just makes me sick. I told him to call ones a week or ones in 3 days but he refuse to do so. My husband is jobless and we live from the money that I have earned. And then this daily long chat on the top, it's just too much for being patient. Can you give us advice for both sides? Yazak Allahu khairan.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
If you are sensitive when your husband talks to his mother for this period of time because of a financial reason or because it results in him neglecting his obligation towards you or your children, then this is acceptable. However, if it is because you are jealous, as it appears, then it is not acceptable.
Therefore, we advise you to take it easy as there is no suspicion between a son and his mother that justifies such jealousy.
We also recommend you that you help your husband in being kind and dutiful to his mother, as this makes you earn a privileged status with him and become honored by him.
He is undoubtedly ordained to be kind and dutiful to his mother; it may be that he feels that his mother loves that he talks to her and that this makes her happy. So be patient in bearing such a period, and busy yourself with what benefits you in your religion and your worldly matters, especially that it is only an hour and it is not a long period. In return, you have many hours when your husband is present with you.
You should understand that she is his mother and he is her son, and you should know to what extent the heart of the mother is attached to her son no matter how old he becomes.
So we believe that the matter is simple, but the devil wants to spoil your life and make you sad. The devil may drag you, because of your feelings, to what is more serious than dissension and dispute between you and your husband, and things can perhaps lead to the breaking up of the family; this is indeed what the devil likes.
Jaabir 
narrated that the Prophet said: “Indeed, Iblees (Satan) places his throne upon water; he then sends detachments [for creating dissension]; the nearer to him in rank are those who are most cause the most dissension (amongst people). One of them comes back and says: I did such and such. And he (the devil) says: You have done nothing. Then one amongst them comes and says: I did not spare so and so until I separated him from his wife (caused divorce). Satan goes near him and says: ‘you have done well.’” [Muslim]
Therefore, you should not give this opportunity for the devil to spoil your relationship, and work hard to irritate him (the devil) instead.
With regard to your husband being unemployed and that you are the one who works, earns, and spends on the family, then your husband should strive to find work, because he is commanded to spend on you and your children. However, you will be rewarded if you spend (on your family) while seeking the reward of Allah for doing so.
Indeed, the Prophet said to Zaynab 
the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas’ood [when she asked if it was permissible for her to spend the Zakah (obligatory charity) on her poor husband and her children]: “Your husband and your children are more deserving of your charity [Zakah] than anyone else.” [Al-Bukhari]
The Prophet also said: “An act of charity to a poor person is only (counted as) charity, while giving charity to a relative is (counted as) an act of charity and maintaining ties with kinship.” [At-Tirmithi and An-Nasaa'i]
On the other hand, the wife has the right to ask that her husband reimburses her for her expenses on herself when he was in financial difficulties, as well as whatever she had spent on her children if she did not do so willingly as an act of benevolence.
For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 103083 and 88121.
Allah knows best.
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