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About to Get Married and Has Whispers about Semen

Question

Asalamualikum Warahmatulahi Wabarakatu, I am about to get married soon, inshallah. However, I am scared to have sex because of how messy it can get. I have never had sex before. I have OCD and I am always worried about things being dirty. I am not sure if the ejaculation from sex is considered pure but if it gets on the sheets or something, will we need to remove everything from the bed and clean it. I'm afraid that I will not know where the semen is and then I will feel paranoid to clean everything. This is really making me feel regret on wanting to have sex after marriage and I don't want this to affect my marriage in the future inshallah. I do deal with a lot of whisperings from shaytan. Please help me! Jazakallah and may Allah bless all of you for helping Muslims!

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Marriage is a good thing which a Muslim should hasten to given the interests it involves with regard to one’s religion and worldly life, such as compliance with the command of Allah Almighty and His Messenger, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam; preservation of one’s chastity; and increase of the Muslim population. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {So race to [all that is] good.} [Quran 2:148]

Treating OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder) is a simple matter. It is a plot devised by Satan to embitter the Muslim person’s life. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {Indeed, the plot of Satan has ever been weak.} [Quran 4:76] A Muslim derives the needed strength to overcome it from the remembrance of Allah and seeking refuge with Him from Satan and his whisperings. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing.} [Quran 41:36] It was narrated on the authority of Abu Hurayrah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “Whoever says a hundred times in a day these words: ‘La ilaaha illa Allah wahdahu la shareeka lah, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu, wa Huwa ‘ala kulli shay’in Qadeer (None is worthy of worship but Allah Alone. He has no partner; to Him belongs all Sovereignty and Praise and He is over all things Omnipotent),’ he will have a reward equivalent to that for freeing ten slaves, a hundred good deeds will be recorded to his credit, a hundred of his misdeeds will be wiped out, and they will be a shield protecting him from Satan that day till the evening. He will not be surpassed (on the Day of Resurrection) by anyone with better good deeds except one who has recited these words more often than him.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

One of the most effective means to treat OCD is to refrain from indulging in such whisperings and keenly repel and disregard them. According to Fataawa Ibn As-Salaah, “A person who is afflicted with satanic whisperings is required to disregard them in the first place. This is an effective means to disgrace his devil and ward off its whisperings and plots, Allah willing, and his condition will be rectified with his good intention. If he does not do so, the following statement by Imam Al-Haramayn (Al-Juwayni) applies to him. He said, ‘The source of satanic whisperings is ignorance of the Sharee‘ah or intellectual deficiency. We ask Allah, The Exalted, to bless him and us with well-being.” [End of quote]

Semen is ritually pure according to the preponderant opinion of the Muslim jurists; it is the substance from which an embryo is initially formed. Allah, The Exalted, Says (what means): {Did We not create you from a liquid disdained?} [Quran 77:20] It was narrated on the authority of ‘Aa’ishah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  her that she said about semen: “I used to scrape it off the garment of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam.” [Muslim] Had it been ritually impure, it would not have been valid to perform the prayer while wearing that garment without washing it, as is the case with other impurities. Accordingly, it is not obligatory to wash off semen, and therefore you should not pay any attention to the whisperings in this regard.

Lastly, we advise you to consult trustworthy specialists and doctors for advice; they may help you out with useful directives or medication.

For more benefit that semen is pure, please refer to Fatwa 428017.

Allah Knows best.

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