A relative of mine has a son that was born out of wedlock. Although we know that Islamically he is not responsible for maintaining the child, he loves the child and sees him regularly. He also spends on the child by giving money to the mother for the child's food, clothing, toys, schooling etc. I want to know if it is permissible or recommended for my relative to continue this relationship with this child? If it is permissible, under what regulations should he meet with the child? The mother is not Muslim and seeing the child means coming in contact with her, talking to her and going to her house to watch the child. He also wants the child to live with him. Is this permissible, since it is not his child? Shouldn't the child remain with the mother even if she agrees to let him go?
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
This man has Islamically no relation with that child and there is no blood relationship between them. His passion and love towards that child is a sign that he is not sincere in his repentance and that he did not sincerely regret committing Zina (fornication or adultery) with the mother of that child. If he had really regretted what he did, he would have felt sorrowful whenever he sees that child out of fear that Allah would punish him for that sin.
Therefore, this man should sincerely repent to Allah and seek forgiveness and perform good deeds as much as possible. Also, he should stay far away from the mother of that child as the devil might push him to commit the same sin again with her. Besides, he has no right to ask after that child or to ask that he stays with him because he has Islamically no relationship with him as we previously mentioned.
Allah knows best.
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