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Fatwa CenterHer brother’s wife refuses to live with in-laws
Question
Assalamu Alaikum Wrwb This is for my brother.He is married for 11years now,has 1son and 1 daughter.Last year they moved to Canada.His wife from the beginning of marriage was not very friendly and warm with either husband nor in-laws.Sometimes she would disobey her husband.How ever things moved as my brother was very patient with her. After reaching Canada,she befriended a neighbour.This neighbour would only teach her bad things like spying the husband and checking his mails,phone history etc.My brother's wife started to follow all this and got suspecious about him.She later put false Allegations that he has an affair with some girl.One day she went upto the extent saying that you have married her.She also put an alligation that her mother in law has done black magic to seperate both of them. My brother at first was disturbed and started being firm with her.Refusing that he does not have any affair nor has he married any one.But she would not agree.Later she would act abnormal and sometimes complaint of chest pain and that mother in law is doing some black magic to harm her.Despite he trying to convince that there is nothing like this she would not accept. Finally he brought her to india,she refused to come to her inlaws and went to her mothers house.Now even her parents believe her.Me and my Sister and Aunt went to talk to them and clarify things.They were rude to us and dint want to talk to us. We dont know what to do,their are ladies in there family nobody to approach to talk,her father is also nomore.weather to Divorce her or to wait for sometime,As time is the best healer. Worried about children as she may not give them good values.We have tried a lot to talk to her she only says i dont want to live with inlaws.I shall live seperately with my husband,no inlaws should come. My mother has only son its difficult also to part with him and grand children. What would you advise,your advise will be precious to us
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
The wife has the right not to live with her in-laws and to demand a separate accommodation, as previously clarified in Fatwa 84608.
Hence, you have no right to compel your brother's wife to live with your mother or any other relatives. But it is impermissible for her to prevent her children from visiting their grandmother or the grandmother from visiting them.
We advise your brother to be eager to bring his wife and children together with him in an independent residence, and reach an understanding with his wife in order to know the reasons why she is treating him badly, and why she accuses him and his mother with no evidence, and to seek to rectify her with all means valid under Sharee‘ah, as shown in Fatwa 85402.
If the means of reform are of no use, there will be no blame on him to divorce her. But let us stress that one should not resort to divorce unless all means of reform do not benefit. If both spouses could come together and live with each other in kindness, even if it means overlooking some flaws, and conceding some rights, this will be better than separation, especially when they have children.
Allaah Knows best.
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