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Distressed because of abnormal shape of nose

Question

Aselamu aleykum, My question is regarding cosmetic surgery. I was born with a nose too short at its end that people refer to it as 'flat'. I have family members making fun of me since childhood and asking where i came from because i look different from everybody around. Even today as an adult, children sometimes make fun of me (some have even asked me what happened to my nose) which causes me a lot of psychological distress that I sometimes cry when alone but it doesn't show on the outside life and i appear to lead a normal life for those who look. I have read the other questions related but still didnt answer my question, please, i need your advice. Jezakumullahu kheyren.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

First of all, we advise you to take it easy on yourself and not harm yourself by thinking about a matter which you have no hand in and making it among the whispers that may influence your thoughts and cause you an unbearable harm. You should preoccupy yourself instead with the remembrance of Allaah and with being grateful to Him, as Allaah ordered us; Allaah Says (what means): {So remember Me; I will remember you. And be grateful to Me and do not deny Me.}[Quran 2:152] There is comfort for the soul and tranquility of the heart in remembering Allaah; Allaah Says (what means): {Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allaah. Unquestionably by the remembrance of Allaah hearts are assured.”}[Quran 13:28] Also, you should preoccupy yourself with what benefits you in this worldly life and in the Hereafter.

Furthermore, you should know that the real beauty is not in one’s features and good looks; rather, the real beauty is in one’s beautiful soul, good moral conduct and perfect manners.

As regards those who mock you, then you should not take this into consideration, as people barely like anything and they generally look for deficiencies. So, if a person is preoccupied by such people, he would die of sorrow. Hence, if someone mocks you, you may remind him of Allaah, and of the prohibition of mocking. Allaah Says (what means): {O you who have believed, let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better than them.}[Quran 49:11]

Besides, there is a Hadeeth of the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) which reads: "Do not glee at another’s misfortune as Allaah may relieve him from it and afflict you with it.” [At-Tirmithi who graded it Hasan (good)]

On the other hand, if there is a way for a natural therapy that turns the nose into a normal condition, then this is permissible as this is a kind of seeking treatment. In case the matter needs a surgical operation, then we have clarified its ruling in detail in Fataawa 83177 and 90335, so please refer to them.

Allaah Knows best.

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