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Conditional permissibility of asking the husband to allocate a day for fulfilling the wife’s needs

Question

As-Salamu alaykum,
I am a married woman. My husband has a private business (working as a barber) and he has customers who come to him on prefixed appointments. He does not take a holiday and even works on Fridays. I also work and my holiday is on Friday. My husband does not allow me to go out alone because he fears for me. I do appreciate that, but is it permissible for me to ask him to allocate one whole day for me and our two-month-old daughter? He finishes his work at 10 p.m. and beyond. Please advise whether it is permissible for me to make such a request. If it is permissible for me to do so, then what is the ruling of Sharee‘ah if he declines? If I ask him to take me somewhere he does not object, yet he does so after 11 p.m., not earlier. I am usually unable to go out at that time in the night because I am exhausted from work. I wake up at 7 a.m. and work two shifts until 7 p.m. Please advise. Thank you.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

In principle, women should work at home where they raise their children and look after their husbands so as to achieve tranquility, stability, compassion, and mercy for all members of the family. Working at home suits the nature of women best.

As it is difficult for women to work outside home, and because they intermix with non-Mahram men and do not look after their children and home in case they go out for work, women should not work outside the home unless they need money, provided that the work suits their nature and circumstances and that they adhere to the provisions of Sharee‘ah, such as covering up, avoiding being alone with non-Mahram men and avoiding intermixing with non-Mahram men.

If you do not need the money you receive from your work and your husband fulfills all his duties and provides you with your needs, then stay at home, work there, look after your children and husband, and provide them with comfort and stability. Working at home is not less important than working outside. It is rather more important and better. This is because a woman who always works outside home returns home exhausted and strained and her husband returns home as exhausted as she is, so where does each of them find comfort? You are entitled to a day in which your husband allocates to bring you what you want and maintain your kinship relations, unless this will involve harm to him. As long as your work runs as you have described, then you should consider the circumstances of your husband and the circumstances of his work, because the matrimonial life is built upon understanding, compassion, and mercy.

In conclusion, if you do not need your job or if your work includes violations of Sharee‘ah, then you must leave it and devote yourself to your home. This will be more suitable and comfortable to you and your husband. You also have the right to ask your husband to allocate a day to fulfill your needs, unless this involves harm to his interests.

Allaah Knows best.

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