I am divorced and feel guilty and suffer from deep depression. My father-in-law did not want my x-husband to call me abroad .Despite this fact he took this step. As a result conflict started between me and my father-in-law .I kept moving to Japan on visit visas for 2 years .When I used to return ,I was forced to live with my in-laws. Eventually I was divorced by my husband as he believed That I did not obey his father. My question is that can the father-in-law order his son not to call his wife abroad? What is Shariah's stance on it? I am badly ill and suffer from dementia .Is it a punishment from Allah for disobeying my father-in-law? How much accountable I am for my x-husband's decisions to keep me with him against his father will? What should I do as a kaffara? should I return the air-fare of my trips abroad to my x-husband because he disobeyed his father as he wanted to keep me abroad and did not fulfill his father's financial needs? Please help and guide me according to Islam.
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
We had previously answered a similar question of yours and we clarified to you that your husband is not obliged to obey his father in preventing him to bring you over if he (his father) does not have a sound reason for doing so, because obedience to parents does not consist in absolute obedience. Please refer to Fatwa 272152.
Hence, you are not sinful for having your husband bring you over contrary to the wish of his father. The health condition that you are suffering may be just a test, so you should be patient and supplicate Allaah to make you sound of all evil and harm. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 83577. Also, you are not obliged to return the airfare that your husband has spent to bring you over.
Your father-in-law has no right to cause his son trouble by preventing him from bringing his wife over. It is the husband’s right for his wife to live where he lives in order for him to preserve his chastity and the chastity of his wife, as well as to take care of his children.
The wife is not obliged to obey her father-in-law, but if she obeys him in what is lawful then this is good. By doing so, she will earn his pleasure and her marriage will be stronger; this is also evidence of her good moral character.
Allaah Knows best.
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