His new wife dislikes that his daughter visits them
Fatwa No: 306742

  • Fatwa Date:23-12-2015 - Rabee' Al-Awwal 12, 1437
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Question

Assalaamu alaykum. I am newly married to a wonderful wife, she is from a different culture, and she is also from another country. I was married before and have a daughter from my past marriage, and I was honest about that from the first day. My daughter live with her mother but visits me on a weekly basis. My daughter is seven years old now. My current wife accepted all that and told me she likes children and that she would treat her according to nature and Islam. So we got married based on that. Now, after a year of marriage, alhamduillah, I have a son with my current wife and my daughter is also happy about having a brother. However, since we got married, my wife does not like my daughter to visit us. Usually, she visits once a week and occasionally twice a week; she stays less than an hour. Every time I tell my wife that my daughter is coming for a visit she becomes upset and stays upset all day. My daughter loves my wife and likes to visit, but my wife does not like it. And she has been giving me a hard time about it recently. She even refuses that my daughter visits us. I do not know what to do to. Let things be in God's way. Thank you.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Your wife has no right to prevent your daughter from visiting you. She bears no sin, though, for feeling rather upset about it because one is not held accountable for feelings that are beyond his control. However, such feelings must not be translated into actions, preventing your daughter from visiting you.

The scholars asserted that the wife is entitled to a separate accommodation instead of living with her in-laws; however, we could not find any scholar suggesting that the wife has the right to prevent any visitor or guest from entering her husband’s house. The basic principle is that this is the right of the husband, as evidenced by the hadeeth narrated by Jaabir  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said, "As for your rights over your women, then they must not allow anyone whom you dislike to sit on your bedding (furniture)." [Muslim]

An-Nawawi  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him wrote, "Scholars held that the religious ruling in this regard is as highlighted in the hadeeth; it is impermissible for the wife to allow anyone, be it a man or woman, and regardless of whether he or she is among her mahrams (permanently unmarriageable) or otherwise, to enter her husband’s house unless she knew or thought that the husband would not dislike it..." [Sharh Muslim]

Our advice to you is that you try to reach mutual understanding with your wife regarding this manner and be careful not to let it cause dissension between you. You can also try to mostly see your daughter in the house of her mother's family if that does not cause any inconvenience.

Allaah knows best.

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