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Apostate must repent and embrace Islam before marrying Muslim

Question

I embraced Islam when I was 15 and practised the religion for two years, but due to a breakdown of my non-Muslim family, I became lost and stopped practising. I had a son at 19 and his dad and I left each other when my son was 2.5 years old. My son is 6 now, and I am 25, and I have been single ever since. About 7 months ago, I met a 27-year-old Pakistani Muslim man whom I have grown to love dearly. I have been thinking of pronouncing the testimony of faith and would like to embrace Islam again. This young man who still lives in his family home expressed that he would like to get married to me to his brother and sister, but they seemed unsure and told him that I would need to convert. He later told them that I had a son, which made his sister angry with him, and she then said that it will never work and that the family will disown him. She then told his dad, who said that if he has those ideas in his head, he should leave the house. We both feel the same way about each other and want to do this properly, but this seems impossible without his family blessing. I do not understand why they cannot accept the fact that I have a son? Surely, their son's happiness is important to them. If I had decided to convert a few weeks after having met him, would his family still feel the same? We are both very anxious and are trying to find a solution. Right now, all we can do is pray and be patient, and hopefully they will come around. Do you think they ever will? Could you offer some guidance please?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

What we understand from your question is that you converted to Islam and then left Islam (apostated), and then you gave birth to a son from a man and then separated from him. After that, you met a Muslim man, and you both want to get married, but his family does not like that he marries you; if this is the case, then you have to hasten to repent to Allaah and embrace Islam. It is not permissible for this Muslim man to marry you before you embrace Islam, because you apostated from Islam. Then, if you embrace Islam and stay steadfast on the obedience of Allaah, Allaah may facilitate your marriage with this man and open the hearts of the members of his family and cause them to be pleased with you.

In any case, if you embrace Islam and remain steadfast on the religion of Allaah, then Allaah will not let you be lost and will make a way out for you.

Allaah knows best.

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