Assalam Alaikum , sheikh I and my boyfriend living abroad, and our marriage took place at Nigeria by our parents, they got us married with the intention of my mahr will be paid by my husband hand to hand since we live in the same city. he rent a house and prepared everything that is needed, he call me and sai on Monday he will come and take me to his house two days after our marriage, if he comes he will give me my mahr and take me to his house. unfortunately I felt serious sick on Sunday,so he rush and took me to hospital, he paid hospital bills and medicines, in fact it takes me almost 3 months he's struggling for my health,I feel sorry for him,he's un able to pay my mahr, he spends all his money on my health. one day I intend to have intimate relationship with him but he refused, he said nothing will happen between us unless he paid my mahr,and I am seriously in need, what's the solution sheikh?Jazakallahu khairan.
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, you must repent to Allah, Almighty, of that relationship before marriage.
There is no blame or sin upon your husband to consummate the marriage with you before paying any Mahr (bridal money) to you.
Ibn Qudaamah said in Al-Mughni: “It is permissible to consummate the marriage with a woman before gifting her any bridal money.” [End of quote]
Therefore, explain that to your husband and let him know that the Mahr is the wife's right. It is permissible for her to postpone taking possession of it, or to waive part of it, or all of it, to her husband with her own free will, and there is no sin upon him in this.
Even if hastening the Mahr or part of it before the consummation of the marriage is desirable, the interest of keeping oneself chaste by hastening the consummation of the marriage comes in priority over it [the Mahr].
Allah knows best.
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