Sexual Relations for Newly Weds
Fatwa No: 81608

Question

I 'm newly married and I would like to know how to do the Halal sexual relation step by step and what I should do.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that none is worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and messenger.

First of all, we ask Almighty Allah to complete his blessing upon you, bless your wife for you, and grant you both righteous and pious offspring.

When a person desires to have sex with his wife, he should say “ By the name of Allah, O’ Allah, protect us from Satan and keep Satan away from what you bestow upon us.” Ibn ‘Abbaas  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him narrated that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “When a person has sex with his wife and recites this supplication, If Allah predestines for them a child, Satan will not harm him.” When he meets his wife for the first time, he should put his hand on her head and recite. “O Allah! I ask from you her goodness and the goodness on which she is created, and I seek refuge with you from her evil, and from the evil on which she is created.

You should know my dear brother that marriage is a tremendous sign of Allah; Allah Says (what means): {And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.} [Quran 30:21]

You should also know that your wife has some rights over you, you must fulfill them before you ask your rights from her; Allah Says (what means): {And due to them [i.e. the wives] is similar to what is expected to them, according to what is reasonable. But the men [i.e. husbands] have a degree over them [in responsibility and authority]. And Allah is Exalted in Might and Wise.} [Quran 2:228]

You should live with her with good manners, and deal with her, as you like her to deal with you.
Allah Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.} [Quran 4:19]

Besides, Abu Hurayrah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him narrated that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “A believing man should not hate a believing woman (i.e. his wife), if he hates one of her characters, he will be pleased with another.” [Muslim]

We ask Allah to perpetuate your happiness and make your marriage full of joy.

For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 85167 and 81556.

Allah knows best.

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