Becomes angry with and pressures his brother
Fatwa No: 83624


I always get angry with my brother and put pressure on him. I would like you to tell me if that is forbidden or not and thank you very much for your help.


Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the World; and blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

The Prophet ordered us to show kindness and gentleness in many Ahadith; some are as following:
1. Ayisha (Radiyallahu Anha) relates that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "Where there is softness it beautifies that thing, and from which it is taken away it snatches its glamour" [Reported by Imam Muslim].
2. Ayisha (Radiyallahu Anha) relates that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "Allah is Kind and likes kindness in all things" [Reported by Imams Bukhari and Muslim].
3. Ayisha (Radiyallahu Anha) relates that the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "Allah is Kind and likes kindness, and bestows upon kindness that which He does not bestow upon harshness, nor on anything else other than kindness and tenderness" [Reported by Imam Muslim].
4. Jabir bin Abdullah (Radiyallahu Anhu) relates that he heard the Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) say: "One who is devoid of kindness is devoid of the good of every kind" [Reported by Imam Muslim].
Imam Nawawi said: 'All the above Ahadith establish the virtues of kindness, urge on adopting it as one's manners, and at the same time they warn against harshness and cruelness.
Allah Admired the Prophet for his good conduct in this verse: "And Verily, you (O Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) are on an exalted (standard of) character". [68:4] He also Says: {And by the Mercy of Allah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you; …}[3:159].
Therefore, you should know, Dear Brother, that you should be kind to your brother. You are obliged to deal with him in good manners. Show him love, gentleness, and affection instead of harshness and cruelty; repent for your faults.
Know that this behaviour may lead to hatred between you and your brother and to many other bad consequences. The Prophet said: "Show mercy to the inhabitants of the Earth He who is in Sky (Allah) will have Mercy upon you" [Ahmad, Abu Dawood, al-Tirmizi and he grades it as Hasan].
Finally, we draw your attention to the fact that if your brother commits something forbidden in Sharia you may deter him and rebuke him. This is only to prevent him from doing Haram, not to take vengeance on him.
Know that when he refrains from Haram immediately, you should stop being offensive towards him.
Allah knows best.

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