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His wife’s aunt spoils the relationship between him and his wife

Question

My wife left home and took the kids after minor argument with my mother. On the way to her aunts house she paniced and was not feeling well (probably she knew she was doing wrong) so she went to hospital. We had problem before but when her aunty came to take her away from me, wife admitted it was her fault and she will not leave me, so aunty felt ashamed. This time she called her aunty agaian from the hospital, aunty told her parents abroad that I beat her hence she is in hospital. Wife went to her aunts house after and said she will stay for 2days until she get a temporary place. Then wife demands to get seperate house, so I said OK, I will arrange this but you must come home because by leaving without my permission is sin and also dis-honour my family. I spoke to her many times on the phone and try persuade her its not good etc....so she agree to come home but if my parents go to her aunty's house to get her. Because my mother does not like her aunty because she heard from some people that her aunty breaks peoples family and also because of the last incident confirmrd her doubts. I went with my father but wife says its not possible unless my mother comes (i know that the aunty is forcing her to say this). Probably because the aunty wants to take revenge on my mother for the previous incident. I love my wife and she loves me but her aunty keeps interfering. I think the aunty is emotionally blackmailing her so she does not know what to do and I cant help my wife because they wont let me. I am confused, I know we can work things out if I could just get her out of auntys house. I told her parents abroad about this and they feel powerless against her aunty. My wife is relegious, she runs classes and does dawa work with a group of sisters, she is loved by all of them and my family. After going to auntys house, all of a sudden she has changed, her tone is harsher against me and dont seem to care about the people who love her, all she thinks of is the minor conflicts.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

It is the right of the wife that her husband provides her with a separate accommodation as we previously clarified in Fatwa 84608. Therefore, if your wife went out of your home because of not getting a separate accommodation or due to being harmed in your father’s home, then she is not sinful. You are obligated to provide her with a separate accommodation and if you are unable to buy a house or rent one, then it is permissible to assign a part of your family house for her provided its amenities are separate; for more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 130282 and 88695.

However, you are not permitted to condition on her to first return home before you provide her with this (separate) accommodation. In fact, your condition on her led to another matter which is that she conditioned that she would not return home unless your parents come in order to accompany her although she has no right to do so.

Therefore, we advise you to be wise in dealing with the matter, so you should provide your wife with this separate accommodation so that she can be safe and secure from any harm that may affect her. If you provide her with this separate accommodation, she is obligated to come to the marital home.

As regards your wife’s aunt interfering in the matter, then this is an evil act and it is wrong for the spouses to spread their problems in a way that other people may interfere in them. Instead, when both spouses restrict their problems to their own marital home, it is much more likely that they will succeed to solve them and keep them far from the interference of other people who usually intensify the problems and make them more complicated.

Allaah Knows best.

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