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You should be deliberate regarding the matter of asking for divorce

Question

Salaam alaikum I am asking this question on behalf of my friend. My friend mentioned to me that another of his friend approached him to see if he would be interested to marry his sister who is unhappily married and would like to come out of that marriage. My question is would it be permissible for a woman to divorce a man if she find no love, happiness, comfort in that relationship. And given that the underlying issue are essentially that of compatibility. Specifics to this case as follows: 1. She has been married for 19 years with 3 teenage children. She is pious and hijabi. 2. She has made efforts in these past years and sought ways to bring love and has made every attempt to bridge gap to make the relationship work. 3. Her husband, according to her, is good person but lives in his own world and steeped in his ways. 4. The mental compatibility gap is as such due to different personalities but further widened by cultural difference, upbringing though both are Muslims. 5. The relationship in the past years has been cold and the couple have drifted further apart. Please advice

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and messenger.

It is not permissible for a wife to ask her husband for divorce except for a legitimate reason. For more information on the valid reasons for seeking divorce, please refer to Fatwa 131953.

The mere fact that there is no love between the spouses in their married life is not a valid reason for the wife to seek divorce. Also, it is forbidden to urge a woman to seek divorce from her husband and to spoil their relationship as we have already clarified in Fatwa 92056.

Homes are not only built on love as previously stated in Fatwa 86796. In fact, there are many other interests that can be achieved through marriage, among which are those children with whom Allaah blessed this husband and wife. The children are in need of an upbringing and good guidance from both their parents so that they can be raised in a good manner and be pleasing to their parents in this worldly life and in the Hereafter.

In addition to this, love can be achieved by having a good marital relationship and mutual respect between the spouses as well as through the fulfillment of the marital rights towards each other. For more information on the rights between spouses, please refer to Fataawa 83157 and 85308.

If a wife hates her husband and fears that this will lead her to neglect his rights, then it is permissible for her to ask him for Khul’ in return for compensation. For more information on the rulings on Khul’, please refer to Fatwa 89039.

Finally, our advice to you is to be deliberate regarding the matter of asking for divorce or Khul’ and to endeavor to reconcile if possible.

Allaah Knows best.

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