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Fatwa CenterDivorcing the wife who has a secret lover
Question
My wife talks with a strange man over the phone. She even bought him a present on which she wrote "I love you." Am I permitted to divorce her for this reason?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
First of all, we advise you to do your best in advising your wife and warning her against this action. You should clarify for her that such a matter is prohibited under Sharee‘ah and disapproved by sound nature. It is absolutely unacceptable for a Muslim woman to treat a strange man in this disgraceful manner, particularly when she is married. Allaah The Almighty Says (what mean): {Nor those who take [secret] lovers.} [Quran 4: 25]
If she showed repentance and refrained from this, there is no harm if you resume your marital life with her. On the other hand, if she refused to respond, in this case it is permissible for you to divorce her, even, it is recommended for you to do this, as long as you are unable to stop her.
Discussing the types of divorce, Ibn Qudaamah 
said in Al-Mughni, “The fourth type of divorce is recommended when the wife neglects the obligatory acts of worship, such as the prayer, and the husband is unable to force her to observe them. Similarly, when the wife is not chaste. Ahmad said, 'He should not keep her as a wife because this negatively affects his religiousness and it is likely that she commits adultery and attaches a child to him while he is not his father.”
Allaah Knows best.
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