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Divorced Her Three Times

Question

I married a lady from the catholic faith and by the grace and mercy of Allah she embraced Islam. We have two boys, aged 8 and 6; Al-Hamdu Lillah, both my children establish prayer, have a good Aqeedah and they are memorizing the book of Allah. Unfortunately, my wife and I have constant arguments and as a result I have mentioned divorce to her on 3 different occasions. We did not follow the correct procedure of Iddah, but I did say to her that (you are Haram for me as a lawful wife on the 3rd time). I was very angry and I do not know if she is still my wife or not in accordance with Shariah. We are still living in the same house I want to make the decision purely for the obedience of Allah. Please advise on the matter and may Allah guide us all.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Firstly, we advice that the word of divorce be not hastily uttered. Uttering the word of divorce is not the solution to marital problems. In many cases, doing so leads to regrettable consequences. Deliberateness is from Allah while hastiness is from Satan. As for the three times in which the word of divorce was uttered, we must say that anger does not prevent the divorce from being effective as long as the anger had not reached a point where the divorcing husband did not know what he was saying. If the husband who is asking this question, had uttered the word of divorce three times, while he was in full knowledge of what he was saying and actually meant it, then he has irrevocably divorced his wife and he must immediately separate from her because she has now become a non-Mahram woman to him. He should not marry her again until after she has married another man and the marriage has been practically consummated. If the second husband divorces her, he can then remarry her if he likes. We are also telling the questioner that it is unlawful for him to let the woman live with him in the same house.

For more benefit on divorce given in anger, please refer to Fataawa 220696, 243088, 245707, 322960, 388225, 395773, 121374, 126164, and 245707.

Allah knows best.

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