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Her husband does not pray or fast

Question

I have embraced Islam. I have three children. I live in UAE. I love my husband very much. But till today I never see him pray or fast. I feel very bad about it. He is very short tempered. When he is angry he doesn't knew what he says. The words which come out of his mouth are sharper than knife. During my recent holidays back home he lost temper and spoke few things which were a secret known only to me and him and he made it known to everybody. I have no peace of mind. I always see that some or the other problem is created by him. If a lady is married then in her life the most happiness can be brought to her if she has a good husband. I embraced Islam and trying my best to learn and practice Islam without any help from my husband. I want to change my life and I want to make my life better and also my children's and my husband's. How can I Do it? My husband gets easily moved by women. If anyone smiles at him or any outside lady talks to him he feels sorry for them and goes out of his way to help them. He then compares me with them and whenever we have any fight. I am so confused as to how to change my life. Nothing seems to be good. I am so disappointed. Please advice me. I have gone through Hell of problems for the sake of my husband and always stood by him at times when he was in trouble. Tell me which women can accept that fact the always tears are given to her and he tries to laugh and joke with other women. Please advise me how to change him and make our life better.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First of all, we congratulate you upon embracing Islam and we pray to Allaah to make you steadfast on this religion until the Day you meet Him.

As regards your question, abandoning prayers and fasting is one of the great major sins. If your husband is as you mentioned that he is neglectful about the rights of Allaah on him, then it is not strange for him to be neglectful about your rights. We advise you to be patient on him as patience is the key to much good. Therefore, this husband should be advised and it should be conveyed to him that neglecting prayers, failing to observe fasting and not fulfilling his wife's rights, is very serious. He should be advised in good and soft words. It is more appropriate that he is advised by people who could have influence on him. However, you should not forget to supplicate Allaah as much as possible to rectify his affairs and guide him to righteousness. It might be that he will repent and you will be happy with him in this world and in the Hereafter. Please refer to Fataawa 88016 and 84235 on the ruling of abandoning the prayer, and Fatwa 83368 on the ruling of not observing the fast.

However, if your husband persists on this condition, then we do not see any good in staying with him as a wife, rather it is more appropriate for you to ask him to divorce you. If he accepts your request, all perfect praise be to Allaah, otherwise take the issue to an Islamic court which will study the matter and remove the harm off you.

Finally, it should be noted that you should be keen on your religion and the religion of your children, and your husband's bad conduct and misbehaviour should not affect your religion.

Allaah Knows best.

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