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Her parents refuse to let her meet her husband before consummating marriage

Question

AOA,
i had my nikah 9 motnhs bak but ruksati is not done yet. but my parents n my husband parents say its wrong for us to meet or talk or go out togather or even sit with each other alone for sometimes my mother says bad things to me that i dont have any sharam or haya and if people will know that i m meeting see me sitting with my husband will say things and i will get my mother insulted secondly both me and my husabnd parents say that ruksati is not done so its wrong to meet or get close with each other i m confused that are we doing any sin in meeting or sitting n doing things with echother in islam although he is not na mahram to me i m in his nikah please guide me and tell me in the lite of islam what should i do

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

We have already clarified in Fataawa 91942 and 88658 that if a marriage contract is concluded between a woman and a man, they become husband and wife and he is permitted to do with her what a husband is permitted to do with his wife, but he should take into account the customs, if any, in delaying that (i.e. the consummation of marriage until the wedding).

However, the best solution is that you should try to convince your husband to hurry up with the consummation of the marriage and if the consummation of the marriage is not done, then you should show your parents and the parents of your husband some of the Fataawa [including this one] which clarify to them that you and him are husband and wife even if your husband has not consummated the marriage with you. Also, some pious people of knowledge may clarify this to them.

Furthermore, your husband should know that you and your parents have the right to prevent him from enjoying you until he pays the dowry.

Any way, it is with wisdom and good reasoning that one may combine between obeying everyone and acting according to what does not contradict the customs and the noble Sharee’ah.

Allaah Knows best.

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