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Dutifulness to parents continues after their death

Question

ASSALAMUALAIKUM WA RAHMATULLAHI WA BRKATAHU RESPECTED SIR, 10 YEARS BEFORE MY FATHER WAS ADMITTED TO HOSPITAL FOR SOME BLOOD CLOT IN HIS BRAIN. DOCTORS TOLD US THAT HE WAS MENTALLY NOT STABLE. AFTER SOME TIME THE CONDITION GOT BAD EVEN MEDICINE DIDN'T HELP US PEOPLE TOLD US TO TAKE MY FATHER TO A SHEIK WHO RECITE SOME QURAN VERSES FOR THIS .THERE WE CAME TO KNOW THAT SOME BODY DONE MAGIC TO MY FATHER HE START HIS WORK AFTER TWO MONTH ALHAMDULILLAH MY FATHER WAS BACK TO HIS NORMAL POSITION. AFTER SOME MONTHS MY FATHER START TO FIGHT WITH US FOR NO REASON REGULARLY WHEN HE VISIT HIS RELATIVE HOUSE HE START FIGHTING WITH US IN A BAD MANNER .ONE DAY IN ANGER HE LEFT THE HOUSE TOLD US TO LIVE HAPPILY .NOW 7 YEARS ARE OVER WE DON'T KNOW WHERE HE IS FIFTEEN DAYS BEFORE MY COUSIN (MY FATHER SISTER DAUGHTER) HE CONTACT US AND INFORME US THAT MY FATHER IS ON DEATH BED COME AND SEE HIM FOUR DAY BEFORE SHE CALL US AND INFORM THAT MY FATHER IS DEAD MY QUESTION IS THAT WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS DEATH OR FOR HIS CONDITION WE WANT TO LIVE WITH HIM BUT HE CREATED SUCH SITUATION THAT ITS EFFECT MY MOTHER CONDITION VERY MUCH FOR THAT REASON WE DIDN'T SEARCH FOR HIM THIS YEARS ALL ARE SAYING THAT WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS CONDITION MY FATHER EARN LOT OF MONEY AND AFTER HIS RETIREMENT WE GOT SOME MORE MONEY MY MOTHER FEELING THAT WE TOOK HIS MONEY AND WE DIDN'T HELP HIM IN HIS BAD TIME. MY FAMILY IS IN DEEP PAIN PLEASE SHOW US THE RIGHT WAY AND WHAT CAN WE DO FOR MY FATHER KNOW. MY RELATIVE IS VERY MUCH JEALOUS OF US WE DONT KNOW WHY AFTER MY SISTER MARRIGE ALL THIS HAPPEN KNOW WE ARE AFRAID THAT MY FATHER GIVE US CURSE OR GOD MUST BE ANGRY WITH US BUT GODS KNOWS HOW MUCH DIFFICULTIES MY MOTHER FACE DUE MY FATHER BAD BEHAVIOUR PLEASE HELP JAZAK ALLAH

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Please accept our condolences for the death of your father; may Allaah forgive him and have mercy upon him. We advise you to be kind and dutiful to him, as one has to be kind and dutiful to his father whether his father is alive or dead. There are ways of being dutiful to one’s father after his death which we have clarified in Fataawa 89528 and 83233.

If you did not cause him to be angry and leave the house, but instead he was angry because of his illness or the like, then you are not sinful. However, if you in any way caused him to do so, then whoever did so is obliged to sincerely repent to Allaah, and also repent for neglecting his/her father and not asking about him after he left the house, as this represents un-dutifulness to parents which is one of the grave major sins. Please refer to Fataawa 87856 and 85041. To learn about the conditions of sincere repentance, please refer to Fatwa 86527.

However, you should be dutiful to him after his death in the way we have mentioned in hopes that Allaah will make him pleased with you on the Day of Resurrection. We ask Allaah to gather you with him in Paradise.

On the other hand, if your father had wronged your mother, then we advise her to forgive and pardon him, as there is a great reward in forgiveness. It is a cause for obtaining Allaah’s love and forgiveness. Allaah says (what means): {…and let them pardon and overlook. Would you not like that Allaah should forgive you? And Allaah is Forgiving and Merciful.} [Quran 24:22]

It is also confirmed that Abu Hurayrah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him related that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: "Spending in charity never decreases wealth, and Allaah does not increase the one who pardons except with more honor, and Allaah raises the status of the person who humbles himself for Allaah’s sake." [Muslim]

Allaah Knows best.

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