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Warning Against Mistreating the Wife

Question

Your fatwa titled HUSBAND IS HELL OR HEAVEN TO WIFE OR VICE VERSA, in that you are saying even wife is also the same.for.the husband, but you dont qoute any proof from any hadith or prominant scholar, then how to accept your answer? And also you say that treat wife kindly is equally important then why did the prophet (pbuh) say : shall i not inform about, pious women among you who will be in paradise, who are kind and childbearing and when they are displeased with the husband or he mistreats her , she takes his hand and says i will not sleep until you are pleased with me. Now see the difference when husband is mistreated the hoor curse, angels curse and he need not reconcile. And you claim it is equally important. And i have never heard any scholar tell that being unkind towards wife is major sin, which clearly is correct after reading the hadiths adressed to husband. Can you explain your answer?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

There is no doubt that just as the husband leads his wife to Paradise or to Hellfire, the wife may also lead him to Paradise or to Hellfire. This is because she has rights upon him in the same manner that he has rights upon her.

Allah Says (what means): {And due to the wives is similar to what is expected of them, according to what is reasonable..} [Quran 2:228]

Ibn Katheer, may Allaah have upon him, said in his Tafseer commenting on this verse:

"Wives have rights over their husbands (as regards living expenses) similar to those rights of their husbands over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable). Each of them is obliged to give the other spouse their due rights." [End of quote]

If she deserves blame and punishment because of neglecting her husband's right, then why wouldn’t he deserve blame and punishment for neglecting her right?

It is not necessary that there should be words of warning to the husband in the same manner that there are words of warning to the wife; he is also threatened (of punishment for negligence). For example, Allah Says (what means): {But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.} [Quran 4:34]

Al-Qurtubi  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said: “If you have power over them, then remember the Might of Allah; Allah’s Might is over every might, so no one should transgress his wife, as Allah Almighty, is indeed in observation and watching.” [End of quote]

Allah has kept the warning general and open to all probabilities as a way of stressing the great importance of the matter, so the husband may get a punishment even severer than that of the wife (for neglecting her rights).

Abu Hurayrah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him narrated that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “O Allah, bear witness that I have declared a warning concerning (failure to fulfill) the rights of the two weak ones: 'Orphans and women.'" [Ahmad and Ibn Maajah]

An-Nawawi  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said in Riyadh As-Saaliheen:

"Meaning: I make the one who does not fulfill their rights sinful, and I severely warn against this and sternly repel against it.” [End of quote]

Al-Munaawi  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him (a Shaafi’i scholar) said in his book Faydh Al-Qadeer:

"It means that they (women and orphans) should be treated with kindness and compassion, and not overburden them with what they cannot do, and that one should not be neglectful about their obligatory and desirable rights. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) described them as weak to move people’s compassion towards them and as an additional warning (against neglecting their rights) and deterring people (from wronging them). This is because the weaker a person is, the more perfect the protection of Allah to them is, and the more severe Allah takes revenge against the person who oppressed him.” [End of quote]

Abu Hurayrah  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him narrated that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “Act kindly towards women." [Muslim]

For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 366796.

Allah knows best.

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