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Her husband is making her life miserable

Question

I have many problems of which I want to discuss some of my problems with you.
I am married to a person whom I loved, but my parents disliked him. They go me married anyway as I like him. My husband follows most of the teachings in Islam. I love him a lot and I am fulfilling all my duties of a true wife and in fact much more than that. I do everything according to him and in his knowledge. Inspite of giving everything to him he doubts my fidelity. Every time he wants me to hold Holy Qur'an and say that I did not look at any other man or have not done Zina. I feel humiliated each time I prayed to Allaah, I have no peace. He does not want me to wear Hijaab thinking that I may go with other men. I feel tired with this, I am frustrated. Please help. I always ask Allaah to give me death so that I can get some peace. At some time I feel like killing myself but I know that after spoiling my mortal world I do not want to destroy my Hereafter world. I don't know what to do; I cannot share my problems with my parents as they will be sad for me. I don't want to add to their problems.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First it should be noted that the Islamic Law urged us not to suspect a Muslim, and warned us against having suspicions as Allaah says (which means): {O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin.}[Qur'an 49:12]. So a Muslim should think good of another Muslim brother until the opposite is proven. If this is the case in relation to the general Muslims, then not suspecting a spouse is more confirmed.

Therefore, if your husband is suspecting you without evidence and preventing you from wearing Hijab, then he has indeed committed a sin. So we advise you to supplicate Allaah as much as possible to rectify your husband's affairs, and you should admonish him in a nice way, for instance reminding him of the saying of Allaah (which means): {And those who annoy believing men and women undeservedly, bear on themselves the crime of slander and plain sin.}[Qur'an 33:58]. If you can seek the help of some righteous and pious people then do so. If he takes heed, all perfect praise be to Allaah, otherwise you have the right to ask for divorce, and it might be that it is more appropriate to do so because there is no good in staying with a husband under these circumstances. If there is a need to take the matter to an Islamic court, then do so.

Finally, we like to draw your attention to the following matters:

1) You have to be patient and not think about some thoughts that the devil might whisper to you, like killing yourself, as this is among the great major sins.

2) It is not permissible to wish death as we are prohibited in the Islamic Law to do so. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: "One should not wish death due to a calamity that has befallen him, and if he feels an urgent need to wish death, then he has to say: "O Allaah! Let me live as long as life is better for me, and take my life if death is better for me."

3) It is an obligation on a Muslim to stay away from suspicious environments and avoid anything that might put him is a state of suspicion.

Allaah knows best.

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