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Misbehaved With His Father and Regretted It After His Death

Question

1. I have misbehaved with my father ,5 months before his death .Could not ask forgiveness directly from him since he was away from me .But my wife has asked pardon soon after the incident . I am finding myself guilty ,pls advise how can i get pardon from him

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

There is no doubt about the great status of the parents and that being kind and dutiful to them is an obligation and that severing ties with them is prohibited.

For more benefit in this regard, please refer to Fataawa 87019 and 84942.

If you have harmed your father with any kind of harm – no matter how small it is – then you have severed ties with him (i.e. you were undutiful and disobedient to him).

The scholars stated that disobedience and undutifulness to parents occurs even with very little harm. Hence, you must sincerely repent.

For more benefit on the conditions of repentance, please refer to Fatwa 86527.

Since your father had died, there is no way for you to ask for his forgiveness, but if your wife had asked him to pardon you – and he did – then we hope that you are acquitted from sin.

If it is not confirmed that he had pardoned you, then we commanded you to be kind and dutiful to him after his death, hoping that Allah would make him pleased with you on the Day of Resurrection.

To know how to be kind and dutiful to the parents after their death, please refer to Fataawa 82254, 91983, 395335, 303685, 83233 and 120936.

Allah knows best.

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